Self trust is often overlooked yet it is the most powerful virtue we have. In order to succeed in anything we must possess this ability. Otherwise we are living through someone else.
When we trust ourselves we are first of all keeping our power, as opposed to giving our power away to outside sources that we look to for the right answer. Then when things don’t go as planned it becomes very easy to play the victim role then blame that source for the circumstances at hand.
You can avoid all this overwhelm by going back to the basics. We all have within us the means and know how to do what needs to be done. It all begins with feeling. We all have knee jerk reactions to situations and do or say things we shouldn’t but if you really listened to your body, something inside of you was telling you to stop. This is why afterwards you feel bad. You already knew what the outcome would be, yet ignored the signs/symptoms.
Because we cannot or do not know how to trust in ourselves, we constantly live in a state of fear and worry (which is part of the reason we have knee jerk reactions). This was a huge lesson for me in my life. I parented out of fear I made decisions out of fear. Everything I did was out of fear. Every action, every reaction. I lived in a constant state of upset and turmoil in my mind until I understood what I needed the most was to trust in myself to handle whatever situation presented itself. And the strangest thing of all was, when you deal with situations as they arise, they are not that big of a deal. When you trust yourself in your abilities to deal with these things, you remain calm and rational. It is all the energy expelled into the doubt fear and worry that makes any situation more dramatic than it needs to be. This understanding did not come easily for me. I seemed to fight it every step of the way and it came with a lot of heartache before I got the message.
The miracle of all this is when you have trust in yourself,
those so called situations become few and far between. You are no longer overwhelmed, you say ‘no’ when you are asked to give more of your time but don’t want to or can’t, you no longer second guess yourself, and you suddenly learn to relax because you are not keeping so busy trying to avoid yourself.
A few things to do when making a decision you are unsure of is stop before reacting and feel what it feels like in your body. Does it feel good or bad? To compare the feelings for future reference, think about someone you really like, a friend, your mom, someone who you love being around and who brings you pleasure. Now feel that feeling and really take note of it.
Now on the flipside think of the opposite, someone you dislike, who you feel uncomfortable around or who makes you angry or uneasy. Note this feeling.
The next time you need to make a decision, parenting, buying a house, relationship, career or anything, ask yourself the question needing answered and compare the feelings.
Trust Yourself and your body to lead you in the right direction always and watch as your life relaxes and becomes exciting once again.