How to marry a millionaire

There comes a time in a girl’s life when paying her own bills, choosing the right kind of mortgage and saving for a new pair of Jimmy Choos all lose their allure. The solution? Marry a millionaire! Lucy Mangan tells you how

Location, location, location

You are unlikely to find many millionaires in your average suburban nightclub, cafe or restaurant. You need to strike out for new territories. Head to London if you are not already there, it’s a burgeoning hot bed of rich list notoriety.

Inveigle your way into Annabel’s, lunch at the Mirabelle and sip classic drinks in exclusive hotel lobby bars like Claridges Bar or the American Bar at the Savoy. Wander round Saville Row and ask any fiscally viable looking candidates for their advice on buying cufflinks for a beloved cousin. Don’t say they’re for your father though. You want to keep their minds as firmly turned away from the phrase ‘sugar daddy’ as possible.

Oddly enough,

one of the best ways to meet really rich people is at the opening of anything you don’t actually have to pay to attend. So hurry yourself along to just about any of the blue art institutions – Tate Modern, the V & A, The South Bank Centre – and get yourself invited to the next bash. Or just turn up. Bouncers at these events are notoriously polite and therefore wholly ineffectual.

Vacation, vacation, vacation

The rich tend to cluster, so a holiday spent in one of their favoured summer haunts can be a very efficient way of meeting the minted. Current playgrounds for the rich and famous include Mallorca, Porto Ercole on the Tuscan coast and Cap Cana in the Dominican Republic (especially if Latin-American plutocrats are your thing). The particularly adventurous millionaire heads out to Mozambique and the Seychelles.

And don’t forget the traditional destinations – Monte Carlo may be slightly old hat but Mustique, Palm Beach (especially if leathery, pacemaker-stuffed retirees are your thing) and Barbados are going strong. And the French Riviera is still popular, albeit with moneyed Muscovites these days rather than the old money of yesteryear.

Know thy prey

All but the very newest millionaires have learned that there is more cachet in displaying wealth discreetly. Perhaps via the £1.35 million Calibre 89 Patek Philippe watch peeping out from the bespoke shirt cuff, or by slipping nonchalantly into a customised Bentley after meetings. Rather this than festooning himself with bling and looking like Mr T threw up on him. So learn to recognise bespoke tailoring, top notch accessories and high calibre hair weaves.



How to marry a millionaire